Why your sexologist wants you to celebrate Masturbation May.
This blog has been brought to you by registered psychologist and psychosexual therapist, Carla Jones.
28th May is National Masturbation Day! And May is International Masturbation Month! This is an annual event to protect and celebrate the right to masturbate.
But why, as your local friendly psychosexual therapist, do I want you to engage with this? You might have seen from all of our social media content this month that we are all about masturbation – exploring self-pleasure in different ways, understanding challenges, demystifying myths – it’s basically been all we can talk about! And that’s because masturbation is generally seen as a core part of sexuality, even though it is often under-rated, ignored, deprioritised, or sometimes even seen as “not real sex”. So here’s why I want you to get around it!
- Masturbation can have many positive effects on our wellbeing.
It can:
- Feel good! Simple, but important!
- Have multiple health benefits (e.g. reduced blood pressure, improved immune function, reduced pain)
- Reduce stress
- Be a helpful distraction strategy
- Be helpful in regulating emotions such as frustration or distress
- Support improved sleep
- Offer relief during menstrual cramps
- Improve focus, concentration, and attention
- Improves self esteem
- Strengthen your sense of identity
- Improve body image and your relationship with your body
- Improve sexual function
- Help you to unwind
- Create feelings of empowerment
- Support in reclaiming your body following negative experiences
- Provide an opportunity to learn more about your body and how to enjoy sexual pleasure in a variety of ways. This not only helps you to feel pleasure in the moment, but can help you communicate what you like to others.
- Support a healthy sexual relationship with your body where it is valued and appreciated in positive ways.
- Don’t worry if you haven’t extended your Duolingo streak or done today’s Wordle, masturbation can do some pretty incredible things to your brain!
Masturbation triggers the release of chemicals that are involved in the brain’s pleasure and reward centre that promote positive emotions, feelings, and sensations. These hormones and neurotransmitters include:
- Dopamine: the ‘happiness’ hormone, involved in motivation, movement, reward-seeking.
- Oxytocin: the ‘love’ hormone, involved in promoting social bonding associated with happiness, and supports wellbeing, positive social interaction, growth, and healing. It also lowers cortisol, the stress hormone.
- Serotonin: a neurotransmitter that helps mediate happiness, optimism, and satisfaction. Higher serotonin is linked to an increase in mood.
- Endorphins: ‘feel good’ chemicals that reduce pain, and provide a pleasurable rush or high, relieves stress and boosts mood.
- Prolactin: a hormone that promotes healthy physiological responses to reproduction, stress, and emotion regulation.
- Endocannabinoids: neurotransmitters that are vital to rewarding behaviours such as social interaction, eating, and exercise, as well as regulating pain, inflammation, metabolism, cardiovascular function, learning, memory, anxiety, depression, and addiction.
- Norepinephrine/noradrenaline: A stimulating neurotransmitter that increases and regulates dopamine
- Adrenaline: A hormone that reduces stress by regulating heart rate, blood vessels, airways, and aspects of metabolism.
- Prolactin: a hormone that influences mood and immune system
3. Cue Vanessa Amorosi, it’s for absolutely everybody!
Whether you’re partnered or solo, young or older, neurodivergent, disabled, queer, trans, ace, white, blak, brown, wealthy, poor (etc) masturbation can be for you! Masturbation does not discriminate, and can be adapted and embraced in ways that are affirming and accessible. You might hear us talk about utilising different toys and devices, mutual masturbation, or even engaging in non-genital masturbation – there’s no “normal” way to do it.
A sexual act that everyone gets to enjoy should they wish? That’s definitely worth celebrating!
4. It can be apart of healing shame and reclaiming sex
Many people grow up with messages that masturbation (and sex in general) is dirty, wrong, or only valid in certain contexts. Masturbation, especially when done mindfully, can be a powerful way to unlearn those messages and rewrite your relationship with your body and sexuality.
In addition, many folks take their experiences of repression and shame into partnered relationships, so taking masturbation slowly can be a way of normalising pleasure for yourself, before exploring this with a partner.
If you’ve had a traumatic sexual experience, engaging with masturbation is a common way of reconnecting with your sexuality and exploring new or different things that feel okay for you. For many this can be a powerful act of reclaiming sexuality, for others, just a necessary step before trying partnered sex.
Is there a downside to masturbation?
The only physical risk is that excessive masturbation may lead to irritated or broken skin, swelling of the genitals, or cramps. With appropriate treatment these can all be healed quickly.
Almost all the negative effects associated with masturbation focus on how someone feels about the act itself, rather than any physical implications on the body. Even though it’s common, masturbation still comes with a lot of stigma and shame. But you won’t go blind, you won’t become sterile, you won’t numb your sensations.
How you feel about masturbation depends on several things including: learning about masturbation, internalising the ‘taboo’ of it, and navigating the tension between stigma and pleasure. Stigma can then limit your ability to experience pleasure from masturbation. Moral or religious opposition to masturbation may lead to feeling guilty or shameful for engaging in it or even thinking about it.
Similarly, masturbation may be difficult for some people to engage in positively, especially in those with sexual dysfunction or a history of abuse. For them, masturbation may be distressing. It’s important to remember that we are all moving at our own pace, and whilst masturbation is a part of sexuality, it doesn’t HAVE to be a part of yours if it leads to significant discomfort or trauma activation. In saying this, I also know that there are plenty of ways that we can support folks who have experienced difficulties to engage with or return to masturbation if they want to!
Whilst masturbation is a safe and healthy activity, you should speak with your doctor or psychosexual therapist if masturbation interferes with daily life, relationships, sexual function, or physical health. Additionally, you can seek professional help if masturbation causes intense or pervasive negative feelings, such as guilt, shame, regret, distress, embarrassment, or if you feel ‘out of control’. You know where to find us!
